Making Relationships Work
Relationships take work. We’ve heard it all before.
Any time I come across someone who is engaged, I cross my fingers that they are spending as much time planning for their marriage as they do for their wedding, but hopefully more. Being in a relationship is hard–you’re trusting another human being with the most important details of your life, or better yet, your future. People grow and change over time–sometimes only one person does, sometimes both people do. I’ve spoken with lots of different friends when they’ve hit a rough patch in their relationships, and the most important piece I try to remind them of is to communicate their concerns to their partner. If you can’t let your partner know if something is bothering you, you have bigger problems in your relationship, my friend.
I had a friend ask me about couples counseling and what I thought of it–I’m a huge supporter of it. Why, you ask? I’m in support of anything that has the potential to help two people better understand and relate to each other. You spend time, attention, and money on so many other things–why is it so terrible to spend it on building a deeper connection with your partner? It’s not. I believe that people should put effort towards relationships they want to see blossom. In my eyes, gone are the days where you judge people for trying their best to understand each other–counseling isn’t just for fixing what is “broken”, it’s to strengthen and build what is already in existence. You’re finding or creating a space where both people are safe to express their thoughts and emotions.
It’s fascinating to think about how easy it can be to talk to those who you feel safe with–they make you feel interesting and fun. They take the time to make sure you’re fully aware that you are important to them. They don’t make you question how they feel about you, and they make you a priority in their lives.
What do you think about couples counseling? Are you an “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it” type?